Wednesday, July 30, 2008

A Bouncing Baby Blog


It's the night before the mad scientist jolts this monster to life and I'm having the damnedest time trying to figure out how to say 'hello'. Not exactly a portent of greatness, I know... but we carry on.

Now, how do I describe what No Short Corners will attempt to provide you on a daily basis? Should I vow to unleash the sharpest of tongues and the cleverest of wits? Should I make a bunch of goofy meta wisecracks? Should I go all intrepid news tamer?

We will get behind the story, taking you into the game, deeper...

No, wait. Stop, stop, stop. That sounds like news porn. Perhaps, I should just keep it simple.

Basically, what Sean and I are going to try to do at NSC is bring your eye to breaking news, look at the lighter (or darker) side of the sport, present stories from a different angle, cast a light on stories on the periphery of the game and, well, sometimes just cast about - all sprinkled with a bit of commentary. Or a wisecrack... we like wisecracks. I will probably also mention food a lot.

We will have some regular themes to revisit whenever the mood suits, such as the hit-and-run Top 5 List, which could rate anything from the free kick artists to stadium food. I will kick off this bit by picking the best five spines in MLS in the post that follows this one.

Mostly though, we will just pop in throughout the day to discuss whatever happens to be on our soccer mind at that particular moment. In addition to enjoying the content freedom and quick draw capability of a blog, we are especially excited that we will be able to interact with readers as you interact with each other in the comments section of each post.

What we really want is for NSC to function like a neighborly community where anyone and everyone gets to participate... you know... kinda like the pick-up game at a family picnic. We want someone to feel welcome and respected as they explain how Cristiano Ronaldo will never be considered a great as long as he sports a rat tail. The more comments we get from you, the better NSC gets for everyone.

To do this, we need your help. No, this will not be a place where everyone has to hold hands and sing, but freedom has responsibilities. Disputes amongst yourselves, clever barbs and criticisms of us are extremely welcome... like birthday cake welcome. Crude language and outright hostilities are not.

Frankly, I couldn't care two toots about profanity as it has never really shocked me. However, we do ask that you refrain from commenting with anything stronger than the odd "ass". Similarly, any whiff of racism, sexism or the like will disappear quicker than Lionel Messi marked by Titus Bramble.

As a matter of fact, let's all agree now on the first NSC family tradition. Let's make a game out of creating new and deceptively PG-13 euphemisms for those times when the discussion and/or tempers veer into risky territory. Let's say someone has made you so mad that you want to literally punch them in the eye... perhaps they had the gall to suggest that the Chicago Fire would be relegated from Ligue 1. Instead of saying 'I'm going to drive over and kick your *&%$@#! ass, you %#$@& little @%@*$!', say 'I'm gonna shave your sheep, you poor man's Ade Akinbiyi!'.

You get the idea. We'd like to keep this hangout open to kids and new fans who are eager to grow their love and understanding of the beautiful game, an aim I'm sure you'd all support. If someone appears to be ill-informed, kindly educate them. I apologize if it seems a belabored point, but it is very important to us to host a friendly party pad. I can promise comments will be deleted if they cross the line of consideration, but I'm sure we don't need to spend all day lecturing intelligent people (you are soccer fans, right?) on what is and isn't cool.

Fact is: soccer is cool... like birthday cake cool. You know it. We know it. And we hope you choose to spread some cool by kicking it around at NSC Park everyday.

Okay, enough with the formalities... let's get busy putting a solid boot to our first corner kick. That NSC birthday cake isn't going to eat itself.

- Greg Seltzer, perpetually hungry soccer lover

2 comments:

Sara said...

I'm gonna go papa bouba diop all over this comments section.

Greg Seltzer said...

Yeah, you just try it... I'll kick you in the Vennegoor of Hesselink.