Yeah, so apparently the reason John Anthony Brooks was dropped from the selection this past weekend (for a 2-1 loss at Bayer Leverkusen) is because he got a large and apparently super-sensitive tattoo on his back, which caused him to miss training.
Hmm. Setting aside that this was surely not wise timing for such personal expression, I cannot help but wonder what has happened to tattoos. When I got mine back as a teenager back in 1987 (shut your face), I played ice hockey twice the same week. If you have ever played (or stood near someone who just had), you will know this is just about the sweatiest endeavor an Earthling can undertake. Don't believe me? Go smell the inside of a hockey glove after it's had some time to dry post-game, then check back with me.
But who knows with this order for the hothouse flower of tattoos? Seems to me being crawled on by defenders might be worse than perspiration, but one could certainly wear some sort of undershirt set-up that helps both conditions. Maybe Brooks just got a big tattoo of Sheldon Cooper. In any event, I think Tim Ream is sizing up his USMNT inside track right about now...
- Greg Seltzer