The Arch Nemeses

Every team has (at least) one opposing player that they cannot stand to see, and every goal scorer has (at least) one club they absolutely love to face.

BY VOLUME

This count was simple: who has lit the lamp the most times against one unlucky opponent.

19 Landon Donovan v FCD (in 34 games)
15 Taylor Twellman v CHI (27g)
15 Landon Donovan v KC (28g)
15 Pat Noonan v RBNY (28g)
14 Landon Donovan v DC (18g)
13 Brian Ching v COL (21g)
13 Carlos Ruiz v COL (24g)
13 Landon Donovan v RSL (28g)
13 Taylor Twellman v RBNY (29g)
12 Ante Razov v RBNY (15g)
12 Robbie Keane v SEA (17g)
12 Jeff Cunningham v CHI (19g)
12 Landon Donovan v COL (30g)


BY STRIKE RATE

Of course, due to inter-conference scheduling differences and shorter league tenures, some dudes don't have 20-30 games to pile up goals against their favorite foes. So I also made up a list with everyone who's chalked up a goals-per-game rate of at least 0.9 against one club (minimum five games played).

1.8 pg Thierry Henry v MTL (9 goals in 5 games)
1.5 Dom Dwyer* v MTL (9-6)
1.33 Bradley Wright-Phillips* v NYC (8-6)
1.29 Robbie Keane v TFC (7-5)
1.14 Roy Lassiter v CLB (8-7)
1.13 Cyle Larin* v NYC (9-8)
1 Juan Pablo Ángel v KC (9-9)
1 Sebastian Giovinco* v NYC (7-7)
1 David Villa* v DC (7-7)
1 Thierry Henry v COL (6-6)
1 Sebastian Giovinco* v OCSC (6-6)
1 Jozy Altidore* v OCSC (5-5)
1 David Villa* v CLB (5-5)
1 Ola Kamara* v NE (5-5)
1 Antony De Ávila v DC (5-5)
1 Jozy Altidore* v HOU (5-5)
0.92 Taylor Twellman v FCD (11-12)
0.9 Bradley Wright-Phillips* v TFC (9-10)







- Greg Seltzer